Excerpts featured here with permission from author, Geena Russo, This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it Tattoo Guru Studio Magazine, Feb 2010 issue.

So today class we are going to touch on the subject of what not to do when you enter your local tattoo shop. I promise you, it will save you time, money, and just maybe keep you from your butt kicked.

1. Do not walk in the shop, show the artist a picture of what you might like, get a price quote, and then say, "Well, so and so said they would do it for $45 dollars." Your tattooer doesn't care. You get what you pay for and nine times out of ten you will be returning in six months asking the higher priced tattooer to fix that bargain tattoo you got. Explain to me why people are willing to pay an arm and a leg for a pair of new sneakers, but refuse to pay for a tattoo they are going to have for the rest of their lives. The bargain is never worth it. It's a bad %$#@&* idea.

2. When you bring your mom, dad, boyfriend, husband, wife, girlfriend, or any other hang around, make sure they don't start freaking out on your tattooer. It makes you look hella stupid, and makes the tattooer want to choke them out.

3. Don't name drop. I can guarantee the name you're dropping is 85% of the time some idiot who pretends to be cool with everyone in the shop you are about to get a tattoo at and makes you look stupid as well.

4. The name dropping game will never get you a better price!!!

5. Don't try to haggle your tattooer down on the price they have given you. He/She works their ass off and deserves to get paid what they are asking for. You wouldn't go to the 7/11 and try to get gas for cheaper. Why do it in a tattoo shop? Like I said before, your tattoo is going to be with you forever. A good tattoo is not cheap, and a cheap tattoo is not good.

6. Don't make an appointment you're never going to keep, because you were bored and decided to make a tattoo appointment to give you something to talk about all week. Just like your Doctor. And his time is his money! I find that most people think their tattooers are super rock stars, but they have bills to pay, some have children to feed and car payments just like the rest of us. Your no call, no show, can really screw up their week. Plus, the next time you come back to your tattooer they will not be happy with you at all.

7. TIPPING!!!! How can I stress to you how important this is. Most tattooers work for a percentage, so tipping is cool! If you only have a dollar, don't bother, its insulting. Explain that you'll get them next time. And then do it. I promise he/she will be very understanding and grateful you acknowledged the idea of their tip. Never say you will tip next time and then don't. It makes you look like a fkn dick head.

8. Most tattooers take the time to shower and brush their teeth every day before work. Why you ask ? Well, they will have to be very close to you most part of their day. They expect the same in return. I've seen many times guys who have to douse people's feet in green soap and foo foo spray because they smelled so damn bad. Its really a nasty situation to be forced to work in. The room you usually get tattooed in has limited space, so , PLEASE WASH YOUR ASS before you come in. Its just plain good manners.

9. Don't time waste! This one I cant stress enough! If you're there just to check out the shop, that's cool, no one minds. Foot traffic is great in any shop. Just make sure to let the people working the shop know that is why you are there. Please don't take up 45 minutes of your tattooer's day talking about the tattoo you might maybe get next month, but you're not really sure you even want a tattoo. If the said tattooer is not tattooing he is most likely drawing up a piece he actually has to tattoo on a client and the time you just wasted could really screw up their day.

10. If you happen to run into your tattoo artist, or any tattooer at a local restaurant or watering hole, for the love of Jesus Christ, please "DO NOT" hold them hostage with inane or drunken ramblings about the tattoo you think would be so cool to get, may or probably will never get. They're out with friends or family trying to relax with some eats and maybe a beer. I promise he wouldn't ask you about your telemarketing job all night. Take note here: This does not mean you shouldn't speak to them at all, but remember that when you're not at work and just want to chill you don't want somebody you don't know bugging you all night. Same goes for your tattooer. Refer to article #6, tattooers are not rock stars. Use some discretion.

11. No, your tattooer did not do all their own tattoos. Just the one's on their backs; with widgets and mirrors. Just kidding. But really, give 'em a break with the obviously stupid questions.

12. Remember that these are real tattoo shops you are in and not reality T.V. shows. The only cameras there are the ones watching to make sure the shop doesn't get robbed.

13. This is a big one. Don't go to a tattoo shop so fkn drunk you can barely stand. You're not going to get tattooed and may end up getting the shit kicked out of you. There is nothing worse than having to deal with a drunken idiot who thinks they are going to get their whole head tattooed for the six dollars and thirty two cents left in their pocket. Sorry, it's just not gonna happen. Sleep off your drunk and go back the next day with a clear head (as much as that is possible), and ideas that can actually be pulled of as a tattoo.

14. Last and just as important as any of the rest of this is; Tattooers don't care about what the folks at the other shops say about the shop you are standing in at the moment. (Nobody wants to hear it). So when you enter any tattoo shop, leave all the bullshit and other shop gossip at the door. I promise you, A. It won't get you in better with the shop you are at, and, B. Most of it is not drama created by the tattooers anyhow. But by clients who feel the need to think their tattoo artist is better than any other, or the occasional disgruntled ex-employee. Your tattooer loves the loyalty and pride you take in their work, just do it in a positive way, but don't feed into the petty bullshit. It's a waste of energy and exhausting for everybody all the way around.

I hope this has helped put the cool back in the pockets of the people that always seems to drop out as they cross the threshold of any tattoo shop they enter. Be cool, show some respect and courtesy to the people who are about to do some really great work on you. And you'll get treated the same way.
Class adjourned.